Pundit-Matic™ 3000

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Apple's new iPad mini is a modest upgrade that has many who were hoping for more disappointed. Sure, the Apple fanbois will buy it, but Apple has failed to keep up with the state of the tablet market. For example, just the other day at CES in Las Vegas, Archosunveiled a tablet with a 11-inch screen and seventy-two virgins with lightsabers that come flying out of the sides and French instructions with a free pack of walnuts and encountering the past by embiggening the least capable 3G reception ever with hamburgers. And it has a stylus. While it doesn't get good battery life, Apple will have to respond to this threat as Gartner analysts projects Archos will sell literally dozens of these devices.

Made in with by neuro. Thanks to The Macalope's sharp and pointy antlers for the idea.